Solemn night

It's 2:48am and I can't sleep. Maybe it's because I've already slept at noon earlier my mind hasn't gone fatigue despite my eyes feeling heavy. I actually planned to wake early today around 5:30 just so I can go for a jog at the lake. Why so early? it's cuz I'm shy. It's kinda embarrassing to me to walk for 30 minutes wearing a three-quarter sport pants and a pair of sneakers along the heavy traffic on the way to the lake. I've been slacking off like a bouse these few days after I quit my job end of last month that I've gained around 2kilos. That's sick isn't it? Anyway the jog's a goner now. Tomorrow perhaps..

The reason I couldn't sleep even after i've rested my head on the pillow for around 4 songs from my playlist is cuz I kept thinking about whether I should carry on going to MICET. Truth be told is, I don't particularly like Micet nor my degree program, which is Bachelor in Engineering Technology in Biosystem. I put my application for the program solely because of the accessible of MARA loan cuz it's one of MARA's affiliated institution. I want MARA loan cuz the repayment of it is depends on your academic performance i.e. CGPA, in which case you have above 3.5, you needn't pay squat. It's very important to me to avoid any more debts since i've already owe JPA 75 grand. So..that's that and it sucks ya know to not getting to do what you want and what you dream of and such cuz you're moneyless in got mountain-like debt.

I actually want to go to UMS Sabah. I for once dreamt of going to school besides a beach when I was probably 10yo and I still remember the dream very vividly. UMS is probably the only university in Malaysia that's near the beach and is so goddamn beautiful from I've seen once in my bro's pics who went studied there. It's compound is goddamn large too you'd need bus to tour around the whole area. I'd definitely be happy studying over there,if only... Micet on the other hand,my friend said that the place's hot,goddamn hot, and there's no town around it so it's boring. That's all about it. What a bummer...

Haih whateverla. You can't always get what you want,right? I just hope I won't mess up my study anymore and get good result,get MARA loan, get good job and pay my debt. Only after that I'd do whatever I want without troubling anyone.

gnight